Dominating Kickball may have been short-sighted

Everyday I ask Kole how his day at school was. Recently he answered by telling me that he learned about mammals. He said, "They have hair, they have babies, don't lays eggs and aren't cold blooded." Then to my demise, he asked me if I knew that. Honestly, I couldn't tell you what a mammal was. I said, "Bud, daddy didn't know any of that." To which my wife looked at me with a dumbfounded stare, non-verbally informing me she wanted the last 12 years of her life back. Now realizing I had without a doubt just proved she had married down, and she was stuck with an idiot, I defensively said, "Public school sucked."

So, I have told a few people my story of "Being dumber than a pre-K-er", and everyone else in the world, who also went to public school, already knew the definition of a mammal. Am I the only one on the planet who didn't know the definition of a mammal? What was I doing in school during mammal week?

That answer is pretty simple, I was dominating in Kickball, foursquare, Russian dodge ball and basketball during mammal week. The main reason I went to school was not to learn, but to hone my athletic abilities on the playground. I would just about cry on days we didn't have P.E. or outside recess due to rain. And don't even get me started about the days we decided to stay inside to do arts and crafts or talk about mammals, or math or whatever and not PLAY KICKBALL.

I did my time in the classroom, so I could live life to the fullest on the playground. The playground was my sanctuary. If the classroom clock was within 25 minutes of recess or P.E. I went into lock-down mode and began mentally envisioning my playground glory.

This now all seems to be have been short-sighted if I am already getting stumped by Kole in Pre-K; I am pretty sure I am screwed. Sweet. Should have pulled it together educationally early on, now I am really paying for my misplaced focus. Let this be a lesson to all you kids...kickball is just for a moment, but mammals, they are everywhere.

Comments

[Kim]

I really enjoyed this story of your school experiences. I have adopted the reality that my kids have learned way more in school than I ever did. Look at all they can teach us!

p.s. I was always picked last for any sport. Obviously I still have hang ups from that.

[Klein]

Hilarious.

I wasn't as good at kickball as you. I was a frail kid. But I definantly was a Russian dodge ball god.
I would purposely get on the bad team just to try to beat all the better players by myself.

6th grade P.E. was my favorite class of all time. Followed closely by 'math for the educated citizen.'

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